159 - Consistency; The ADHD Way

I view consistency a little bit differently than the normies. I prefer my own ADHD acronym it. Mentioned in this episode, the mighty acronym CACACCCC

Consistent Awareness
Consistent Attempts
Consistent Curiosity
Consistently Cool with Yourself

Try the FREE ADHD Big Brother Episode Finder!  Type in your struggle, get two matching episodes. No emails, no sign-ups. Find your episodes →

Transcript

Copy Transcript Copied

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Does anybody else like the king or queen of grabbing onto lightning, like this intense motivation and then going balls to the walls on a goal and then it dies? Maybe it's a burnout, or maybe it's a you know a forgotterone, you know, totally forgot to get back to it, whatever it is. Wouldn't it be nice to have consistency? Let's figure that out. You are listening to ADHD Big Brother, the podcast for adults struggling with their ADHD and comorbid depression symptoms. I'm your host, Russ Jones, author of Destending to the Top, believer that you can actually have a smile in your life despite this diagnosis. So let's make some sense out of this struggle. Let's learn some stuff, let's laugh at some stuff. Ladies and gentlemen, here's some stuff. Welcome to the podcast, you guys. I hope you guys are doing well. I'm a little bit distracted right now because I mentioned the phrase balls to the walls in the opening, and I really have no idea what that phrase means. Literally, like what is balls to the walls? I mean, I know it means going hardcore. That's why I said it, but what does it mean? Does it have to do with my testicles? Does it have to do with like bouncy balls? Let me just research this a quick minute. Please hold. I'm having some serious deja vu about this. So the expression comes from the world of military aviation. In many planes, control sticks are topped with a ball-shaped grip. One such control is the throttle. To get maximum power, you push it all the way forward to the front of the cockpit or the firewall. So-called because it prevents an engine fire from reaching the rest of the plane. Another control is the joystick. Pushing it forward sends the plane into a dive. So literally, pushing the balls to the firewall would put a plane into a maximum speed dive, and figuratively, going balls to the wall is doing something all out with maximum effort. The phrase is essentially the aeronautical equivalent to the automotive, pedal to the metal. And you know what? I was saying balls to the walls. It's not plural, it's balls to the wall. Wow. That was satisfying. I love learning new things. Okay, back to business. Click, click, click, click, click. Uh, first up, let me give you my mental health update. Things are pretty stable. Like, I'm like almost off the rails. Guys, looks like there's been no incidents. We're pretty stabilized. Oh, it's not that dramatic. Come on, Russ. Um, things are pretty good with me at the moment. I'm feeling good. I'm in a relationship. She's awesome. She's a total dork. She's funny. She is kind. So obviously, I feel like I somehow tricked her. But I have noticed this week that I'm I'm taking naps midday and I tend to stay catatonic once I get into bed. So it takes a huge effort to get back out of bed. I wonder if any of you guys can relate to that. Um, so I'm putting some boundaries on my nap time uh set up at the moment. Um, in terms of my ADHD brain, I am unmedicated for ADHD because all the stimulants have given me shitty side effects, and I'm not up for experimentalizing with new ones uh at the moment. And so this just means that my my focus is shitty and my distractability is epic. Uh, so being cool with myself is the biggest pill that I'm taking right now. And that is the Rust Jones Mental Health Update. Let's move on to the business report. Uh, this is what I've got going on. Uh, my mentor, Dana Rayburn, by the way, she's an epic ADHD coach, and I am her Jedi Youngling. She's helping me put together this uh, it's like a four-week momentum intensive that I'm gonna be offering as a discounted beta program to any of you guys if you're interested. Uh, I'm gonna take a maximum of 10 people for this group program. It's like accountability on steroids. Uh, the outcomes here will be uh significant progress on a single goal, boosted confidence in overcoming procrastination, and a sustained momentum, which is fueled by community support and personalized accountability. It'll be four weeks long, two group calls a week. Uh, it's gonna be hardcore and fun. So uh we're gonna kickstart some shit. So if you're interested, there's uh there'll be a link in the show notes to get more info and to put yourself on the wait list. Again, it's a beta. It'll be super discounted, but I will take a maximum of 10 people for this. So should be exciting. Check it out. Okay, so consistency. In an ADHD life. That sounds like the start of a really epic in an ADHD life, one man, one the idea of consistency is for me typically the consistency of these perfectly structured routines. I wake up every morning at 6 a.m. and I routine my routines until the next routine midday, and then my exercise and water and my evening routine, and it sounds neat, but to me it also sounds pretty much like this boring prison of monotony, like the same shit every day. And for my ADHD brain, that's a it feels like a hard no. And yet, in the same breath, when I do have some routines in place, my life seems better. I feel more positive. So fancy that. This is the bullshit conundrum of ADHD to me. It's that when I think about a thing like structure, routines, and consistency, I can often feel tension about it, and I want to feel motivated and excited about things. And so I try to figure out how to be motivated and excited about these things that are supposed to be good for me, but it doesn't work. Consistency to me, it doesn't mean consistent success. It doesn't mean that I consistently achieve the thing. To me, I take it back a little. So it's for me, it's it's being consistently aware, being consistent with my attempts, uh, being consistently curious about what's getting in the way and what I can do to mitigate those obstacles, and being consistently cool with myself on the my limitations in the moment. And that one can be tough. So I guess if we we could create an acronym for it, right? A A C C. It kind of sounds stupid though. Like we're aware, uh attempts, uh, curiosity, and cool with ourselves. Yeah. It's basically okay, so if it's consistently aware, consistently attempting, consistently curious, and consistently cool with yourself, so that would be like kaka k-ka kuk. C-A-C-A-C-C-C-C-K-K-K-K-K-K. Whatever helps you remember it. Okay. If kaka k is the way to go, then do it. Let me put it into an example for you. So let's say you want to create uh the habit of walking every morning. Okay, so you're consistently aware of how you feel about that walk, how you feel in the moment. You're paying attention to the internal resistance, or maybe in some cases that you're motivated. You're consistently attempting, you're putting it on the schedule, you're planning it in advance. So you're talking about it, maybe you're getting accountability buddies or accountability buddies. If you're finding it too hard, you're attempting to make it easier. You're consistently attempting, not always doing, we're doing this the ADHD way. And then you're consistently curious. This sort of goes along with awareness, but when you feel blocked or if you fall off track, asking what happened, being curious as to what's getting in the way, and being curious as to what might help to nudge you forward next time. And then finally, you're consistently cool with yourself. In ADHD town, we all forget the thing we're working on. We all miss days in a row, we all drop motivation and need extra help. Being cool with ourselves about that is, in my mind, one of the most crucial steps in the consistency practice. Consistently being cool with ourselves, despite what our brain might tell us, that's a really big deal. Hope that's been helpful to you guys. It's a this is a quickie, but it's in summary, ADHD consistency acronym is C-A-C-A C C C Caca k- And I believe you can do it. My challenge to you guys this week is to ask yourself what might you put consistent effort towards? What might you throw some kaka at? I bet you if you have consistent awareness, consistent attempts, consistent curiosity, and consistent being cool with yourself, I bet you'll kick some major butt. Give it a thwack, let me know how it goes. And that should that should that should do it for it. I'm pretty anybody any questions? I'll hold for questions. No questions? Okay, great. Then we're good. Um, all right. So remember if you have interest in the four-week momentum intensive, please be sure to click the link in the show notes and I'll keep you posted and answer any questions you might have about it. And with that, I hope you guys have a fantastic week, and I shall talk to you later.